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Posts Tagged ‘Sad’


My world is all askew eight now. This has been a rough year for our family. My middle daughter was in a horrific accident a couple of months ago on an early rainslicked highway, where she lost control of her car, and hit the barrier wall, it could have been way worse, but she luckily escaped with bumps, bruises, and a very sore neck, unfortunately her car was totaled out, we are lucky she is still alive.

On April 13th while donating some food for a friends food drive, my wife and
I were injured in a freak accident with our car, she was run over by the right front tire over her left leg, and I was dragged approximately 20 feet and then run over by the left front tire, it ran over both legs, left me with a fractured fibula, and road rash over both legs and my hip, it has been a very slow healing process for both of us, my wife is back to work now, but I am still partially laid up, my wounds are painful, they got infected and not healing up very fast, even with extensive antibiotic therapy.

Then on April 24th my oldest daughter Marci was viciously attacked and sexually assaulted. She had come to visit my wife and I to spend the evening with us, she had not been able to visit due to health issues, and we were still homebound  due to our accident. She left out home a little after 11:00  PM, she was exiting off of the freeway on 90th South offramp, she was stopped at the light waiting to turn left, and a man jumped into her car in the left passenger seat, held what she thought was a gun to her head and instructed her to so exactly as her told her, or he would kill her. (Before you chastise her for not keeping her car locked, she thought it was, the automatic door locks had not worked properly, and her passanger door did not lock.) He instructed her to drive to to a local park in Sandy Ut, (Falcon Park 9200 S 1700 E, Sandy, UT 84093). He then had her climb into the back seat, he cut off her clothing, and then repeatedly slashed at her with a knife, while also beating her, he had taken off his, pants and suddenly a car pulled inot the parking lot of the park, and he shouted “oh fuck”, jumped out the car, put his pants back on and took off. I truely believe had the car not pulled in the parking lot, he would have raped her and most likely killed her.  She then drove herself to the ER, she did not want to stay in the area alone any longer, and called 911 from the ER parking lot.

Sandy police are still conducting a full ivestigation, and are still waiting for DNA results. They did as press release a couple of  days after the tragic incident, and I personally contacted all four local news stations 3 of which respnded to do a full report on the news, channel 13 here in Utah chose not to, intead they posted a partial report with thier own spin, that sounded very much like the police did not fully belive it ever happened. It did in fact happen, and I was there at the hospital that evening/early morning, I will never forget the sight of seeing my daughter laying in a hospital bed covered in blood with cuts and bruises all over her body, and yes the police were there in force.

Local news report

The police finally had a sketch artist conduct a composit sketch here it is with a brief description of the suspect.

So here is the composite sketch of the man that attacked my daughter. This sketch is almost 100% spot on. Again this happened on the night of April 24. The man was white had a black baseball cap with darker hair coming down from the back. He had a slender face and long skinny nose, he had a scab or a mole on his left cheek, a thin mustache and very crooked teeth, which the sketch artist drew those as well. At the time he was wearing a white tee-shirt with the letters ARC in red on the left, black jeans, dirty tan work boots, he also had a black zip up hoodie and was carrying a black backpack and he stunk really bad and had horrible breath. 5’11” approximately 200 lbs. The police are still investigating so if anyone sees a man that fits this description please call the Sandy Police Department right away. (801) 568-7200. Please help find the man that attacked my daughter so she can go on with her life! Please share this with everyone! Let’s make this go viral!

 

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We need this to go out all over the internet, this bastard needs to be caught and prosecuted to the fullest extent the law allows. I hope all of you will share this, and make it go viral.

This incident and all the others have taken a heavy toll on myself and my family, this is some of my therapy indealing with all the recent tragedy in our lives, I hope you understand why I feel the to not let it all go, we are all working on getting our lives back to some form of normalcy, not that it ever was, but this helps a little.

Just want to say I love you all and thanks for taking the time to read this.

 

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First of all let me say that I am not seeking sympathy by my blog today. I am seeking understanding, so more people can understand what it is like to live, and battle Chronic pain everyday. I have hereditary peripheral neuropathy, now complicated by Type II Diabetes. One of the issues I battle with is, I look fine, It is harder when people can’t see your disability.
Causes and descriptions of Neuropathy.

My wife and I were watching a program on Chronic Pain sufferers, during the program the question was asked of each individual, “Have you considered suicide?” this prompted my wife to ask me the suicide question, my answer was yes, I have thought about it, but know I do not consider it as an option. She started weeping and said “I never knew it was that bad for you.” I told her I am pretty good at hiding my pain, as I do not want to burden my family or others with it.

I watched my Mother go through it from grimacing in pain, crying, moaning when all she wanted to do was relax, all the while her condition was getting worse from not being able to drive, and finally before she passed away, not being able to walk. In addition to this taking every pain medication that was made available to her, and none of them improving her quality of life. I loved my Mom very dearly, and I miss her every day.

I myself made a personal decision not to take pain pills of any kind, I am not bragging about how well I manage it, but after watching my Mother, and My Father-In-Law (For a different health issue) take pain medications, it has made me make the decision not to take them.

For the most part I am pretty good at hiding my pain, yes sometimes I complain about it, but those are on the days when it is at the level of a strong 10, based on the 1 thru 10 numbering system, sometimes I should respond with it is at a 15, yes it does hurt that bad. I am never not in pain, my pain levels for the most part average around a 5, last night when my wife and I were talking it was at a 7. She asked my why I do not tell her how bad it is, I guess it is because I want her to be happy, and not burdened with my pain. As I write this blog today my pain is at a 5.

It is sometimes scary when I think about the future, the possibility of no longer being able to drive, losing my ability to walk, right now I do fairly well, with the exception of my balance issues, which are getting worse, which has forced me to use a cane when walking long distances.

So far most of the time, I do not take anything for pain, not even over the counter pain medications. I use mind over matter, and it works if you concentrate hard enough.

I have tried marijuana, and it really worked, for the first time in years my pain was completely gone, I had a feeling of euphoria, the reasons I have chosen not to continue to use it are #1 It’s still illegal in Utah, #2 Not really a fan of getting high. I do have a CBD Oil vape, that helps on the really bad pain days, but I do want to use it all the time. I do not want anything to be a crutch in my daily existence.

Due to my health issues, and a terrible job market for people over the age of 50, we lost most everything we worked for all of our lives, my career making a 6 digit income, our home, most of our possessions, we are on the road to recovery, but with what my wife makes and me living off of SSDI, it is a slow process.
That brings me to the discussion of legalizing Medical Marijuana, even though I may choose not to use it, it should be a right for anyone else to do so. In my personal opinion any politician, Doctor, and anyone in the medical profession who is against it, is being pressured by Big Pharmaceutical, with their kickbacks, and payouts, or they are taking the prescription mind altering pain meds, and don’t care. As far as it Medical Marijuana being a “Gateway” Drug, there is no proof of that, but there is proof that opioid painkillers are a “Gateway” to Heroin. Not to mention the high incidents of Opioid overdoses. We need to legalize Medical Marijuana.
Opioid addiction
Cannaboids
I closing today, I just want to say thank you for your understanding, and life goes on!

As always Rusty Loves you, peace, love, and happiness!

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Hurt


Sometimes people just hurt you without really knowing it, and sometimes they hurt you out of spite. You can be rude, nasty, and mean, but when you hurt someone it not only goes to the heart but it goes to the bone! You can apologize but it does not take the hurt away.

I learned back in the 80′s not to hurt someone, and I am not talking about physically hurting someone, I am talking about mentally hurting someone. Unfortunately I made that mistake, and even though I apologized to the friend I hurt, our relationship was never the same, and it was all my fault.

Please think about what you say before you say it, you cannot take back hurt!

Sometimes someone puts their heart and soul into something, and when you mock it, or attack it you can truly hurt that person, it has happened to me.

Tis easier to hurt than heal. ~German proverb

A stiff apology is a second insult. . . The injured party does not want to be compensated because he has been wronged; he wants to be healed because he has been hurt. ~Gilbert K. Chesterton

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain.. and most fools do. Dale Carnegie

Please think about what you say before you say it, you cannot take back hurt!

I really like what his quote form the Dalai Lama says!

I just think, there are times when people need to think about what they are saying before they say it, because hurts cuts deep.

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As always Rusty loves you!

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I just do not understand why there is so much hate.

I really feel a lot of the hate we are experiencing today is generated by politicians, the government, and the media. They want to keep us divided, because a divided people are easier to control.

I know some friends of mine will not be happy when I say this, but a lot of hate is also generated by the ultra right wing conservatives, and the Tea Party.
They claim to want to re-enforce the constitution, but my question is where in the constitution does it say to hate?

Rather than put the entire constitution in here I will give you a link

http://www.archives.gov/exhibits/charters/print_friendly.html?page=constitution_transcript_content.html&title=The%20Constitution%20of%20the%20United%20States%3A%20A%20Transcription

When are we all going to accept the we are all humans, and that is just it. We need to quit separating us by names.

As long as it does not directly affect me, or my family who cares what you do in your own world.

I am so tired of hearing the argument that you are just exercising your religious freedom. Show me poof as to where God and any god you believe in that says it is okay to hate someone, for their race, sex, lifestyle, LBGT or anything like that.

I guess I am living a pipe dream hoping that one day we will accept everyone no matter who they are.

I just want it all to stop.

You do have the power as an individual to make some changes, change it within yourself, preach love not hate, pretty simple isn’t it.

We do not have to accept that is the way it is.

I do feel John Lennon said it all with this great song.

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Szekely Janos


As always Rusty loves you!

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